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Wednesday, July 25

PART I: HOW TO TALK SO KIDS WILL LISTEN & LISTEN SO KIDS WILL TALK




As a former elementary school teacher, I wished I had read this book before I started teaching. Communication is such an important skill that can either harm or strengthen relationships. I'm only halfway through the book, however have already picked up so many useful tips that I hope to use with E in the future:

  • "There is a direct connection between how kids feel and how they behave" (p.1). 
  • We need to learn how to "hear" our kids and acknowledge their feelings. This doesn't mean that we become permissive parents and agree with everything they feel. They don't need us to agree with them or be ok with their actions, they just need to know that their feelings were accepted. Then they're more willing to accept the limits we set for them. 
  • When we give our children instant advice and solutions, we're keeping them from the experience of figuring out their own problems. They end up growing up not trusting their own perceptions and constantly relying on others.  
  • "One of the built-in frustrations of parenthood is the daily struggle to get our children to behave in ways that are acceptable to us and to society.  This can be maddening, uphill work.  The more intense we become, the more actively they seem to resist" (p.49).  Parents need to help their children deal with their negative feelings, however parents themselves need to learn how to deal with their own negative feelings too and figure out why their kids are responding the way they are.  
How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk shared so many ways in which parents can be authoritative without being micro-managers. What's been helping me the most are all the illustrations and detailed examples and exercises on how to carry out these conversations. 

I've still got some more to read, but I will definitely be reporting back to you all soon! Have a great night! :)

3 comments:

  1. Weiya,
    Thanks for sharing this! Although I don’t have kid of my own yet, but I do have 6 nephews and nieces. I’m going to check this book out.

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  2. Looks like a great book that all parents should read.. can't wait to pick up a copy.. Also I just adore your silhouette artwork.. such a cute idea! Thanks so much for joining in the under 300 followers blog hop.. I am your newest follower~
    xoxo
    Amie @ Pinkapotamus

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  3. I've never read this, but I probably should. My problems are more along the lines of "how to make your kid stop talking"

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